Truth in advertising?
Yesterday, we engaged in conversation based upon pages 122-125 of the 12×12. (Those who wish can go here to read the passage.) This falls under the chapter on the 12th step – practicing these principles in all our affairs – and speaks of how we have a hard time becoming “right size.” The book attributes our grandiosity and false pride to fear, stating “We simply had to be number one people to cover up our deep-lying inferiorities.” It is at this point that I linked back to page 42 and the explanation of fear and resentment as our God-given instincts blown out of proportion. We can never be content with who we are. We long to be richer, smarter, loved by all, etc. We truly are egomaniacs with inferiority complexes.
The program teaches that we alcoholics are bodily and mentally different from our fellows, and to a large extent I agree with that. We are far from normal. However, I really don’t think that the general population is all that different from us. Their insecurities may not be near as damaging as ours tend to be, but insecurities do exist and they are harmful no matter who you are. I came across the following video today. Please take a moment to check it out. I’ll catch up with you on the other side.
What I love the most about this video is how the women describe the person they see in each picture. How many of us walk around thinking of ourselves as beautiful, open, friendly, light or someone we’d want to talk to? Instead, we imagine ourselves the opposite: closed-off, harsh, old, tired, fat, etc. If perception is reality and our aim is to become whole, then must we change the world to see what we believe about ourselves or must we change our own perception to match what others see in us?
False pride is the same as false advertising. And whether it is positive pride (grandiosity) or negative pride (self-deprecation), the same holds true: the only people we are fooling are ourselves. Our insecurities are nothing but paper tigers created by false advertising. Of course our natural instincts get all out of whack when we are confronted by these insecurities because we feel we need to protect ourselves. If we could only begin to see ourselves as others see us instead of falling for our own false advertising then we could easily defeat these paper tigers and come to truly love ourselves.