Step 6

Sometimes life gets so stupid that you just have to laugh. Often, you will cry, scream or flail about like a stubborn child first, but eventually you’ll get to the point where you crack with all the pressure and just throw your hands up in surrender. Becoming “entirely ready to have God remove all our defects of character” looks a lot like this.

Biggie and I have recently received a few reminders that we need to be more mindful of money matters. A two ton cherry was dropped on top of our little pile of bills today as his truck took its final gasps of breath. Yes, today was very much a “if I don’t laugh I’ll cry” kind of day. I’m rather pleased about it, though, because this immediate crisis has shoved us firmly into the “entirely ready” camp. This is a welcome surrender because the land of “death by a thousand paper cuts” bleeds me dry so much quicker than I ever imagine.

And yeah, this sort of surrender should look familiar. It’s the same exact thing we did in step 1 when we admitted we were powerless. Step 4 reveals just how powerless we are in all sorts of other areas of our lives. In step 5 we finally voice that powerlessness out loud. And in step 6, we remember that we decided that we wanted God to run the show. We can think of this step as another step 1 over another area of our lives – it is surrender, plain and simple. Some days I’m more stubborn than others and sometimes I don’t have to wait for a two ton cherry to fall on me before I’m willing to let God have all of me. The more I practice letting go, though, the less pain I end up put myself through in the holding on.

“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me — now let me rejoice. Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt. Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me.” – Psalm 51:7-10 (NLT).

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4 responses to “Step 6”

  1. carrythemessage says :

    I love 6 & 7 (sometimes hard to separate the two at times). There isn’t much in the BB about them (one paragraph each), but they are very rich and long lasting. Seems simple…entirely. Sure. Easy to say! But wait, there’s some stuff that I seem to have a hard time letting go of. Hmmmm. Why’s that? I thought it’s not me in charge any more? Why is it that thing is something I am not wanting to let go? Well, I also have to remember that I don’t get to decide what needs to go. I have a pretty good idea about the easy stuff – ego, pride, fears galore, etc. But in my short time sober, I wonder if there are some things that either a) I am unwilling to part with (most often the case) or b) what I think may be a character defect is something that the Creator may want to keep. I ain’t God, so I am not going to touch b) much there. But the one thing that crops up for me is my introverted nature. I thought that that should go for sure. Who wants to hang out with a quiet, shy-ish dude? I need to be out there! shaking hands, patting backs, holding court, being in the middle of the pack! I tried that early on in my recovery. didn’t work at all. It went against the grain of me. I told my sponsor this and he laughed (he’s the guy I was trying to emulate) – he told me that I would attract others by my quieter, relaxed self that may be scared off by his gregarious nature. And it’s true. so while I think I know what is best for me rarely is…lol.

    I love this step because I need to be on top of my willingness to be willing at times and being in the loop of my char defects…I love letting go of stuff. Sometimes my ego gets in the way though.

    Wonderful post…sorry to hear about the bad day.


    • littleman031103 says :

      But this is the difference between 6 & 7. In 6, we become willing to get rid of our defects – we surrender them. In 7, we humbly ask God to remove our shortcomings. How can we be humble while we’re telling God what we don’t like about ourselves? Our step 4 inventory doesn’t just find our goods & our bads… and who are we to determine which of our qualities are defects and which are assets, anyway? God needs introverts for things extroverts can’t do. In the Garden of Eden, it was the “tree of the knowledge of good and evil” which God warned us against. When we judge the characteristics God has given us as good or bad, we are playing God. Yes, the Book does a huge disservice to these very separate steps. Step 7 coming soon. 🙂

      • carrythemessage says :

        You’re right – I can’t determine what is good and what isn’t…and that used to be maddening for an alcoholic like me..ha ha. Still can be! But like you said, doing so puts me in the position of playing God…and we know what happens when we try to play God. Ugh.

        I like what the 12 & 12 says about 6 and 7. Drop the Rock is also something I read that deals with those steps. Probably I need a rereading on all of these…thank you for this. 🙂

      • littleman031103 says :

        We are a stubborn lot and need to be reminded often. 😉

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